My tusheez

This blog was started once upon a time when a young girl at school didnt know better but thought otherwise. So the way earlier entries can be crass and words inappropriate so please don't judge. As now the person has evolved into someone older and wiser (hopefully) ..:.... But some of the entries were classic and hilarious so I don't have the heart to delete them :@ Well we were all young (read:wild) once, right?

Friday, March 17, 2006


I don't know if you believe in fate.

But I do. I tend to dramatise things and mold situations as deemed fit. Molded so much that all coincidences seem to be 'fateful' events.

Call me an idiot, call me a romantic, call me a dreamer...

But I believe in fate.

I was browsing Cessa'a friendster the other day and learnt that her caption was..

"To Fear Love, is To fear life.."

And It can't be truer.

Love may come in many outer forms but deep down, they're achingly similar.
Like all things, they are just what you think they are.

Am I getting sappy again? I am feeling rather sappy actually. Sappy and sleepy..

I spent the first 5 hours of Sunday nursing an ex boyfriend, back from totality/KO-ness next to a drain.

It didnt help that there were so many mosquitoes, that the flooring was rough, that it was fyucking 2 am in the morning, and that the bugger is 1.83m and about 100 kg, or at least it felt like he was. He'd stiffen his body whenever I tried to pull him up and he refused to move an inch, except for falling all over the place. It also didnt help that I am such a sucker for this kind of drama. It didn't help that all his good friends seem to think that he was best left with me as he would box everyone else who bothered him or tried to get him to sober up and go home, but he would not, to me, or they so predicted. Mother Theresa I am not. Drama mama I am.

But if I let the knocked-out bugger cramp my thighs/back for hours (for I had to stop him from eating the cement), swear at me sporadically and sometimes rudely, then subsequently concuss in his familiar blackness , let the passers-by laugh and lurk, and let the constant jabs of nicotine keep my fyucking SLEEEPPY being awake, so that we won't get robbed, especially because he was wearing his Armani suit and was completely a temporary vegetable.

Then I don't think it was just drama.

It was absolute insanity/stupidity.

I could have been fast asleep on the bed instead, no mosquito, no back ache. Bloody hell.

I believe it was fate that I happenned to be near-by, I happened to be called by his best buddy who got worried. I happened to be free and I happenned to be in a reasonable mood.

Yes, so fate is almost = coincidence. It would be that curly equal sign (an approximate), eh?

It was a very vulnerable moment for me, slightly depressing, definitely nostalgic, helplessly puzzling. It was a conundrum (Sham just taught me this word), if you know what I mean. Several times, I really wanted to leave him behind and go home. But I know I couldn't. Part of me didnt leave, NOT because I felt responsible, but because I really wanted to be there. I wanted to be the first person he saw when he woke up. Just part of me. Part of me was terrified of being there. Afraid of what was to possibly becometh.

If only I could read some people's minds. Seriously. Some people are one big, gigantic mistery, they should learn to blog so that we can just read them and understand them, thus forgive them.

I am feeling rather sappy and depressed now. For myself and for everyone else who doesnt know what they're missing.

Please ,open your eyes widely today. Look around you. Is what you're looking for in front of you? Has it been all these while? Have you been appreciating those around you?
Have you done ANYTHING for them lately?
Do you know what you're missing? Do you know how to keep it?
Are you even awake??


I'm not trying to preach or what.. but we should celebrate love everyday.
To fear love.. is to fear life!! And to fear life... you are really 3/4 DEAD!
.. This is so scary, mang...


So, that must be more of my cock and bull poos.

Enough sappy thoughts, I suppose.
I still have more pictures to show. Sigh... This is getting out of hand, I must be such a narcist and such an exhibitionist to NOT mind putting everything I live for on a bloody web-based diary. Ha!


This is the last episode of the KL story.

I went to Jalan Sultan Ismail with Jep and Tze Wei. The row of pubs and clubs there were quite interesting. A lot of those ala Bali, ala Al Fresco kinds.

This is Passion, where upstairs play trance and al Fresco downstairs play RnB..


We walked past RumJungle... another ala Bali-feel plus rainforest shades and maybe Zoo-like party feel.

if you actually bother to turn your head sideways and read the bloody banner.

It says something like.. "Best Bar in Asia or something.."

So.. Beach Club, eh?
. Is this really the best that Asia can do??
That's freakking sad yo.. I've been to lovelier places..
This place is just packed with ang-mohs and bapuks only what.
Not that I am against them, but I dont spot anything that special.

There was a live band but it's the very standard kind. Skimpily-clad Phillipino girls, with their long hair and their band, serenading the audience with pieces like J Lo's 'Let's Get Loud' and danced about shaking their wholesome booty...

Really no big deal. The scene is too familiar.

Me opposite Thai Club. I was so smileyyy.. I must be so happy!

Thai Club was packed too. Leon told me he was here the other night. It looks kinda dodgy.. Anyway, We weren't going in..

So we just took photoes, I was embaraasing the two KL-sians, namely Jep and Tze coz I kept snapping pictures away like noone's business.

This is a roadside culture in Malaysia : Lok Lok.. Choose your thingy-on-a-skewer, dip in the boiling soup and pour the sauces, 3 to choose from, chilli, black and peanut.

It's 1 Ringgit each I think.

The one in Genting was so expensive mang, bloody hell..

After walking about so much, We walked back to Passion..

Me and Tze Wei at PAssion..

Me and my ALI G

ALI G again, ok, Jeffrey Chaw.. and my rashes.. haha!

Ah, you know ah... The Hilton actually provides this stressball in the conference rooms.
I stole one when there was a conference/seminar going.

A black stress ball and All delegates get one.

So... is it because:

1) It's so stressful at a conference, you need to squeeze and release.

2) It's so boring at a conference, you need to squeeze and stimulate your senses.

3) The speaker is so bloody long-winded and annoying and you may need to throw the bloody stressball at him!!

Hehe... I think 3) can be quite applicable sometimes eh?

This is Cheryl and me again.

This is the old Railway Station, I thought it's a beautiful building, I certainly hope that KL will be able to maintain it better, it's a real pity. They could so turn it into one of the grandest hotel there, ala Fullerton Singapore.

Anyway, this is where I took my coach back from.

Ahh.. now it's time to sit still for 5 hours and go home...
I cant wait, actually. I kinda miss home.
I miss Jac and Sham and the kitties. I miss Jason and his gang.
I miss Mich, I miss work (????) and I miss...



Actually I miss having a boyfriend. A stable, slightly more predictable life. WIth love all around and worries kept away.......


Anyhow, I am going to HONG KONG SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course I will bring my camera... I will explain my itinerary next entry... Hehehee..


At 6:37 PM, Blogger MengZ gently snorted that...

hmm....In Love = Insane
ur blog proved it, from the wrtting.

At 7:41 PM, Anonymous blackcat gently snorted that...

Can give me any 4 numbers? I feel lucky this weekend as something funny just happened to me.;=)Btw, bring that plug along to Hong Kong in case of different volt to charge your priceless camera's batt in order to capture those priceless moments...

At 9:13 PM, Blogger WhiteShepherd gently snorted that...

Just remember that if you keep feeding a stray cat, it will keeping coming back for more. Sometimes you have to be cruel and heartless and let them go to fend for themselves. Maybe it's more the experience of having someone is what you miss, not a particular person. I haven't been out with anyone for 6 months, and constantly think about my ex, but 1 out of 10 days I actually remember why we broke up, and to even think about getting back with her is deconstructive.

At 8:23 AM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

i'm insaneeee?????
hmm.. im not in love but i am insane huh..

blackcat: yup.. tink shd bring the plug.. thx again..

whitehepherd: hmmm maybe ure rite.. its not the person, its the predicament..


dun tok about sappy stuffs lah

At 9:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous gently snorted that...

er miz, why are you so stupid wan?

At 3:02 PM, Anonymous HUzzsicat gently snorted that...

You talk 2much about KL already. Can you travel somewhere more exotic and then tell us about it? Like Panama, Cuba or Moscow, uhm or Durban

At 5:18 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

ano: ayeee. I never said im not eh

huzz: u sponsorr?/


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