My tusheez

This blog was started once upon a time when a young girl at school didnt know better but thought otherwise. So the way earlier entries can be crass and words inappropriate so please don't judge. As now the person has evolved into someone older and wiser (hopefully) ..:.... But some of the entries were classic and hilarious so I don't have the heart to delete them :@ Well we were all young (read:wild) once, right?

Saturday, April 30, 2005


Fiday was my last night in KL..

I tried to savour every single endearing moment in the gorgeous Hilton hotel room.

I sniffed every corner..

caressed every inch..

tried every buttons..

Peed many times..

Finished up all the shampoo, cotton buds and shoe shine cream in my creative ways..

And took photoes of my shopping..

MANn.. I was on a freaaking shopping spreeee.

I am broke ...brokee.

The big box's got my birthday cake in it!!!

But there was noone to blow my candles with...hikss

So.. in case it melts before 2nd of May, I took a photo of it..

Happy advanced Birthday SillyCelly you sad asss! Posted by Hello


I put the thoughts away...

Then I went out clubbing...

The Ivy bar then Zeta Bar.. of KL
Chivas got me pretty drunk, but in a nice way..

This is me and Cheryl @Zeta, she's been sucha darling..

Ira's not in the picture.. the lady was drunk too..

*such an artistic photo* Heheh..

Tell u wat spoilt my nightt.. fuckin chi ko peehh..
all around..... a few of them sad arses..
oggling at me like they're all freakin looserrrs..

One of them actually had the nerve to brush his filthy hand against my buttt..
I really would have punched him if he wasnt so oldd.d.
I scared he'll die from my punch.. heh.. farkin stupid old man..

I tell u... if u're overrr 40 and u still trry to get into young girls' pants like that..
You're a freakkking farkin L.O.S.E.R...
You are hum sup chikopeh!! Geddit???
Go Geylang, Batam or KL's Bukit Bintang to get ur gals laaa..
flasshh 20 ringgit.. get all the ass u wann.. u fyucking LOSER!!!!!

And that was my last night...

I concussed nicely on the princess' bed..
I salivated all over it to mark my territory..
Woke up to a sumptuos breakfast and....
before I know it..
it was time to head home...

The drive back was kinda sad..

When I saw this view....

I started tearing..

Posted by Hello
*Friggin immigration point*

I dun wanna go homee..!!!!!!

I wasn't the only one sad...

See the lil boy....

< *even the lil boy boy in the car in front pities me from his rear window..* Bye bye Malaysia.. Adios Hilton.. Sayonara pee washer...




When I reached my dinghy-like room in the hostel...

Hiksss. ...more sorrow...

Somehow.. my room is uglier than I used to remember..
Weather is hotter and the bed is not as soft...
heh.. and no LCD screen..
And the toilet.. *sigh...*

Heh.. I can hardly live this way now..

Freakin spoilt already...

Hilton spoilt market!!!

As I sit back and reminisce.. while absorbing reality...
I realised I've learnt a few useful things during the trip.

I've learnt about the different types of men *especially engineers* from different corners of the world.

As it was a global meeting. I met blokes from Japan, Korea, USA, China, Singapore, Germany.. etc etc..

Some are shy, some are nice, some cant wait to get into my pants.. some are just .... losers


Here's the study:

1. Mr Kim Bab of South Korea

The shy gentleman would look at you softly , missing the eye contacts slightly and asked for your name card.

Kim Bab: Err.. ehmm.. do you have.. the name.. er.. name card??
*take out his and pass to you with 2 hands*
This is mine.. Thank you...
*Will glance up and down and smile shyly*

Verdict: Not bad.. quite polite.. shy engineers..

2.Mr. Jiu Ming Ah of China.

He would try to look for your name badge on your chest and then perpetually divert his gaze to
the centre of the chest.

Jiu Ming: SOOoo.. is yoohr neim plo-nounce ass Ma chY?

*Machy my arse.. tsk tsk.. never read name properly right.. were u distracted?? Heh.. sly bugger..where's the Y from ah? HUH? HUH?*

3. Mr. Willy Dick of USA.

He would blatantly stare at your chest and speak as per normal.

Dick: So, I hear the Zouk in KL is good place to chill out. Wanna rock tonight?

Me: No.. I am going to see 'bomoh' to poke needles up your arse mister...


4. Mr Achtung of Germany.

His sharp long noses reminded me of the dracula already.
Let alone when he tried to converse in English..
Dracula with German accent.. sheeshh...
He might be trying to hit on me for all I know.. but I wouldn't know a thing he's saying.

Achtung: Seoww,, yer faine tonichtten mizh, izz ich juzz golerhrmen schoeltat chsooet?

Me: Err.. *big sorry smile* I dont know...

*Always safest to say this.. Really*

5. Unagi-san from Japan.

Unagi-san: So, Haw ol ar yu?

Me: Er.. 23, 24 soon

Unagi-san: Ar yu sing-gal?

Me: Eh.. yes single.

Unagi-san: Ah.. Ai em sing-gal tu!

Me: Err .. So??? What are you like.. 60?

Unagi-san: Ha Ha Ha.. but Ai em be ri yang et hart!

Me: *polite smile* So desu ne..

*Young at heart doesnt mean young performance-wise dude..
just keep playing the scenarios in your heart k.. *

6. Mr.Alibaba from Saudi Arabia.

They are so polite I was surprised. Really not what I thought they were.
You know how they say the blokes in Middle East are like hungry lions.
That's why the ladies had to be covered up top to toe.
But no, they were pretty polite. At least the ones I met.
They would smile, greet you, ask you friendly questions and they wouldn't ask you out.
And it's quite hard to tell if they'd peeped into the cleavage anyway, coz their eyelashes are so bloody thick.


So.. those are the blokes I've come acrosss...

I met Singaporeans too. but I dont have much complaint.

By the way....

I picked up something wacky in KL..

What is this????

Too narrow to be an earphone..

Too small to be a plate scrubber..

Too stupidlooking to be a keychain...

WTF is it??

I've been enlightened..

It's a spectacle cleaner..


ok Posted by Hello

Not bad.. my glasses never cleaner....


At 11:32 AM, Blogger Jayaxe gently snorted that...

You can try living in those construction workers' quarters then you'll think your room is heaven. Hehe.

Anyway, have a wonderful birthday! (See, tomorrow's public holiday must be set for you one)

At 11:37 AM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

jx: thank u.. hehehe.. yah i shd go live by contruction worksite ehh.. hehehehe...

At 11:50 AM, Anonymous Guofeng gently snorted that...

What about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes???

At 11:57 AM, Blogger crazycat gently snorted that...

i thot the spectacle cleaner was a nipple-cramp... hehe.. happy birthday celle!! =)

At 12:12 PM, Blogger little artie gently snorted that...

Hi, my first time visiting ur blog. Cool site! :) never knew Arab guys can be so nice and decent for a change. lolz

At 12:18 PM, Blogger stoolie gently snorted that...

happy bdae celly~
no presents though =P

At 12:25 PM, Blogger J Schnorng gently snorted that...

well, sounds like you sure had fun...and the bit about no complaints about sg guys? really or not? i don't believe leh....


At 12:36 PM, Blogger Adrian gently snorted that...

SG guys suck. But their average score has been pulled up by my solo efforts, fortunately. :p

At 2:12 PM, Blogger Guojun gently snorted that...

Happy birthday babe. And welcome back. Personally, I think engineer's suck. The subjects suck, the job suck, and the people... well... you know better than me...

As for SG guys, I think Celle too numb to our suckiness to feel anything already....

At 2:26 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

cat: nipple cramp? geeezz.. why the need to?

little artie: welcome and yeah.. maybe just the few i've met were nice..

stoolie: thanks and boo..

j: i trying to be nice la.a. next time then bash them..

ad: hehehe.. righty-o

guofeng: thank u and sg guys.. hehe.. aiyorrr engineers not so bad actually la.. we spose to be smart and all..
and sg guys.. maybe ahh.. too accustomed to.

At 5:34 PM, Blogger CyBorg gently snorted that...

Welcome back Celle!
And a very Happy burbday....
do get drunk! :)
ur "digicam" on the way. along with the pyrometer! Be happy...stay insane, love it when ur mind goes all crazy.

Engineers or Nearengines are the focal point of all industries!
Gotto change the mindset of Guojun there! It's an interesting job! a lil dull tho. Haha

At 5:42 PM, Blogger Edmund gently snorted that...

Actually, SG guys are lumayan lah.

At 6:54 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

guo jun: thanks for the bday wish!!
sg guys arent so bad laa...

imran: thx to u as well..

edmund: yup yup lumayan is right la.. better than indons.. kekekkeke...

At 6:59 PM, Blogger Hai~Ren gently snorted that...

Happy birthday in advance girl!

At 7:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous gently snorted that...

hey gurl. though u dunno me. but i juz wanna say happie bdae gurl!!! juz wanna let u noe tt the new mr s'pore is mr hougang...

best wishes
mr bedok

At 7:29 PM, Anonymous ead gently snorted that...

"Me: No.. I am going to see 'bomoh' to poke needles up your arse mister..."

hahaha u crack me up lah!

At 7:30 PM, Anonymous ead gently snorted that...

sorry, no present for ya. =(

At 7:52 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

mr bedok: for real this is mr bedok??? Wahahhaa.... THANK U!!!!!!!!!!1show ur face leeee

hai-ren: thank u!!!!!!!!!

ead: hehe glad i did.. and thank u!!!!!!


ZOUK ANYONE???????????????

At 8:17 PM, Anonymous ead gently snorted that...

zouk? as in now???
wah KL not enuff ah?

At 8:54 PM, Blogger barata-chucha gently snorted that...

hey celly,

been reading your bloggie at a constant basis. Really very interesting!! :)

Haha, and you're really pretty :)

At 9:25 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

ead: sposedly la.. but a bit sleepy liao..

barata: thank u.. u look so cute too!

At 9:29 PM, Anonymous koh gently snorted that...

Happy birthday to u too. My birthday is also on 2nd may. Can I share that cake?

At 10:17 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

koh: thank u! hahhaha share cake?can can..i email u the rest of it k..

taureans rock!

At 10:27 PM, Blogger Adrian gently snorted that...

Oh yeah, happy birthday. And as for Zouk, just fucking nabeiz cheebye say fucking when, man.

At 11:02 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

ad: thank u!
And def after exams.. next weekend???!!or next next mambo?

At 11:59 PM, Blogger ah chuan gently snorted that...

happy birthday!!! timenow is 2355hrs when i entered this comment~ Enjoy this special day of the year, it's your day!!
(i'm juz a boy who likes to visit your site for hilarious posts :D)

At 12:42 AM, Blogger Hai~Ren gently snorted that...

Mambo on 11 May! =D

At 1:50 AM, Blogger stoolie gently snorted that...

im feeling good. how bout a belated one?
less than $10 bucks hor =D

At 2:59 AM, Blogger Adrian gently snorted that...

cfm 11th May Mambo!

At 4:53 AM, Blogger CyBorg gently snorted that...

zouk was happening babe!
should have been there...
always next time!

At 7:42 AM, Blogger Edmund gently snorted that...

Are u sure SG guys is better than Indon guys?
Indon guys are more hebat leh
Anyway, Happy Birthday to u lah.

At 8:29 AM, Anonymous Anonymous gently snorted that...

Hey gurl. yeah its me alrite... if u see me in nus, do say hi. hehehe. if u give ur email, i'll email some of the pics.

mr bedok

At 1:32 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

hairen n ad: OnZ!!!

stoolie: wat u buyin for 10 bux??

ah chuan: thank u!!

so glad my readers show face!! really! at least its not some guy with cock up comp with virus that keep refreshing my website by default. would be nice to hv such a virus tho

At 1:34 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

ed: yur yur..

mr bedok: got my email on my mainpage wad.d. click the button and send me pics.. =)

At 9:20 AM, Anonymous Sleepless in Bangkok gently snorted that...

Are you those very reserved-looking and decent-looking ladies in cardigens/suits during conferences haha.

Well at least if you are (reserved,decent-LOOKING) I see the cover of this book is badly misrepresented.

Birthdays are fun! abeit overrated...

At 9:22 AM, Anonymous Sleepless in Bangkok gently snorted that...

And on a side note,

I think people come back to read because you bother to reply, earnestly. And usually politely(cannot say the same for Auntie Celly).

Thanks for being just plain old nice.

At 4:22 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

mr bedok!!! : still waiting for picsss *grrr..*... btw u shdve won laa..

sleepless in bkk: i try to reply whenever i can.. i just dun feel good if i dun.. it's like ppl say hi.. u dun say hi back.. hmm rude?

reserved looking in cardigans??
hmm.. maybe smart looking in suit!!! hehehe

At 4:47 PM, Anonymous Sleepless in Bangkok gently snorted that...

Hey U actually reply to comments on old posts too.

BTW there is this stupid policy in Taiwan, one has to run from the apartment (currently on 8th floor) to throw garbage when the truck comes.
One CANNOT throw garbage downstairs first, they have a NO GARBAGE and GARBAGE BIN policy....2#$@^%&^(*&....

Garbage are bigfucks here in Taipei....

At 5:30 PM, Blogger Dipstick gently snorted that...

Happy birthday.

Been following your Blog for the last 2 weeks. Its definately the most enjoyable by far!

Too bad you had to leave the wonderful hotel, perhaps as a birthday gift, you can get your friends to chip in to install one of them special sevice loo with built in entertainment system in your home?? If enough of them chip in you can even go for an upgrade to this top of the line model!! Think of the possibilities?? Check it out!! ;)

This pic would not have induced any reaction from me previously but now I cannot help but laugh! Thanks a lot!

anyway, Happy birthday!

At 7:30 AM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

dipstick: ah yay! thank u!
hope u like the postings! does have wacky pictures!

At 12:39 AM, Blogger kidWithItchyHands gently snorted that...

i'm a singaporean
but i've lived in kl for 4 years
amazing place huh
i lived in bangsar, i could walk to bangsar baru and jalan telawi where all the clubs were
but i was too young..haha, only went once
it was...O.K.
and about the sick old man....yup, i've seen them before

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