My tusheez

This blog was started once upon a time when a young girl at school didnt know better but thought otherwise. So the way earlier entries can be crass and words inappropriate so please don't judge. As now the person has evolved into someone older and wiser (hopefully) ..:.... But some of the entries were classic and hilarious so I don't have the heart to delete them :@ Well we were all young (read:wild) once, right?

Monday, April 18, 2005

HRM is Fyucken Bollox

********************************************************


Engineer's Anger,

File of complaint

Title: HRM is bollox.
Reported by: Miz Celly IzSilly
Written on : Saturday 16th April
Published on: Monday 18th April


______________________________________________


Content:


I am right now in the library,
extremely frustated with my Human Resources Management (HRM) Notes.

This is because HRM is complete bollox !

Chapter 6 is a MTF lesson on... Emotions. Heh..

Apparently, Emotions affect behaviour and attitude. (like ..SO???)

These are the exact phrases:

"Emotions are feelings that represent a positive or negative assessment of our emotional experiences related to the attitude object.

While Behavioural Intentions predict behaviour, emotion can also directly affect behaviour. "

"You feel emotions and you think of attitudes"

Question: What are emotions, behaviour and attitude?


In this report, we shall analyse this 'Emotions' problem from an Engineer's point of view.

To facilitate thorough understanding, Adrian the Great and I came up with an example.

*more like he did...as I was screaming out profanities*..
( yes, in the library, sorry.. wat to do)


--SCENARIO:

Let's say, you were meeting a boy for the very first time
and during this encounter,
he started scratching his crotch.

What would be your emotion towards him?

emotion = feelings = Disgusted. ..* NO, not turned on*

So this 'disgusted' feeling has become your emotional experience.

so, disgusted = emotional experience.

What would be the attitude then?

Attitude = You'd dislike him and stay away..

What about Behaviour?

Behaviour = You'd dislike him and walk away..

Hence, we end up with,

attitude = behaviour.

Then we got STUCK..

Attitude and Behaviour.. got difference anot?

Like sama sama leh

Apparently they are different,
Benson the Great explained that attitude is targetted to a certain object, while behaviour is not.

I then turned to Adrian the Great. He seemed to be full of thoughts.
He was almost glowing.

Then he did the " AHHHAAA!!!!" thing.

Ad the Great: "See ahhh.... behaviour is like speed, attitude is like velocity!"

(brief moment of silence)

Me: *stunned for awhile* ....Ad!!! Wad a bloody genius..
Attitude needs to be directed somewhere, like velocity, its a vector.
Behaviour doesn't, just like speed, its scalar.

( Another moment of silence)

So, we shall assign attitude with the symbol a, behaviour with the symbol b.

attitude = a (vector, depends on direction : + or -)

behaviour = b (scalar, directionless, neither + or -)

So, a x a = a(square),
but,
(+ve) x (+ve) = (+ve)
and (-ve) x (-ve) = (+ve)

Therefore attitude squared will give (+ve) value at all times.

This makes it unidirectional.. SOO....... heh.

Ad, explain lehh....



Ad the Great : I think you should rest. You goin bonkers..


Me: Yah I go blog about this. Quite memorable. Be back in a sec.


Hur Hurrr..



**************


Miscellanous frustrations unleashed:

What the hell are they gonna get out of differentiating between mundane stuffs like attitude and behaviour? HUH?

Engineers absorb knowledge on thermodynamics, mechanics, materials, so that we can build plants, make handphones, refine crude oil, build damns, build HDB and save the world!

Tell me just what the HECK are the eloquent beings gonna do with the fact they have gloriously discovered the difference between behaviour and attitude?
HUH?

How is this of any use?HUH??

They're gonna build an Attitude Washing Machine? HUH?

They can have more words in the dictionary? HUH?

Don't tell me it's so that they can write about it on textbooks and confuse more engineers taking HR2002 in the future. Basket!
Good luck la y'all..


Besides, HRM is all about the practical bits...
Just because you can write structured essay with bombastic words and argue your points accross impressively, it doesn't mean that you could make a good boss/manager in the future.

Q1: Can you actually act it out and perform?

Q2: Be the charismatic, inspiring and competent leader?

Q3: Or shall the facts remain in black & white?

Then you go suck your toes.

Or you suck mine, quite smelly .





******* BAH******SKET**********!!

Upon compiling the above complaint, I gave Jac her daily dosage of SillyCelly's wailing.

Me: Babe.. I am gonna screw up HR paper.

Jac: Why you worry so much.. write essay only wat.. all bullshit one..

Me: But NUS profs dont seem to like my bullshits..

Jac: You think what.. write ur blog ah..

Me: Eh.. hehe.. You know I always go out of point.

Jac: Your forte I believe.

Me: Uh..Babe, can I still get an A for HR if I do go out of point?

Jac: No

Me: What if it's funny?

Jac: No

Me: Hilarious?? Poop in pants kind?!

Jac: No

Me: ..........><

********************


Stay tuned for more AUNTCELLY's time

22 Comments:

At 2:35 AM, Blogger YuZ MaMbO gently snorted that...

Haw haw... Another gem... Your writin skills juz went up a notch. Tat adrian damn smart ah. Manage to bridge IQ wif EQ.

One tip, to get an 'A' for your paper is to write it as though you are 'Aunt Celly'. You replies to ppl's probs are full of emotion. Another tip is to write as though u know something but actually u know nothing. And if all fails, kindly slip a crisp 100 dollar note(US currency is highly recommended) in your answer script. Wat u think eh.

 
At 3:05 AM, Blogger Gabrielle gently snorted that...

haha i get that all the time with business people. Write bulls**t bout creativity, crap like that.

Trick? Throw a SMOKE BOMB! smoke thru lah!

 
At 3:41 AM, Blogger jllt gently snorted that...

A lot of lecturers commended this format: definition of key terms within the question, an elaboration of these terms, an argument, supporting examples and conclusion.

On the bright side, it's the final semester! Less than a month to go!

 
At 7:28 AM, Blogger Anthony gently snorted that...

Celly,

I have it on good authority that NUS does not train engineering students to be engineers. NUS trains engineering students to be middle management.

I don't think that's really fair on undergrads in the Engineering faculty to be subject to this sort of bias, but them's the breaks.

 
At 10:05 AM, Blogger Shortphat K gently snorted that...

Here's a trick i learnt in college although not in NUS. Be as funny as you can, attach a USD$50 to your paper and maybe you can get away with an "A"...I put a 10bucks in my paper once and i passed it because i was ingenuine enough, and so my prof said.

 
At 10:42 AM, Blogger Kenny gently snorted that...

ouch..i tink my hairgel xpired,coz its either it or the answer u gave celle..2 read back ,my comment IS confusing..but 2 read ur reply..it hurts more..and this new post abt HRM is also confusing..i tink i shud join the ACCC..

 
At 11:27 AM, Blogger crazycat gently snorted that...

i am sure many people will line up to suck your toes.. hehe..

 
At 12:51 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

ad the great u readin?? ppl say u velly smart!!

yuz: i tried the 100 dollar bills things b4.. didnt work leh.. my NUS bills got 100 dollar discount the next sem..

jllt: yeah my tutor taught tat too. thanks babe

gab: hehe.. u shd be takin soon isnt it?

anthony: actually i find HRM quite interesting laa.. i enjoyed the lessons.. this entry was spur of moment thing.. so full of angst.. actually its a liddle useful..

k: 50? so stingy.. i put 100

knychai: just call the samaritans lah..

cat: sure not? even i dun wan

 
At 4:32 PM, Anonymous stoolie gently snorted that...

woah. honest lecturers!
hahahaha.

damn. i thought u would have pics to act out the emotions =X

gd luck for your paper. with your cheekiness and intelligience, im sure, and all your readers are sure that you can do it! eh Yuz...i dont remember u telling me u do it for ur exams leh...should have tried this method for the programming tests last time, shldnt we?

 
At 5:22 PM, Blogger YuZ MaMbO gently snorted that...

Sorry celle, need to use your blog space...

Eh stoolie, Last time i couldn't do it coz i was simply broke lah.

 
At 5:27 PM, Anonymous Kevin gently snorted that...

hrm is a fucking waste of valuable time and paper. there's nothing you cannot learn from experience and simple common sense. its so typical of these stupid bureacrats, who probably has no or minute experiences in the market to try to compartmentalise common sense.

 
At 6:16 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

thanks kevin,, there u go. uve said it all

 
At 6:46 PM, Blogger Gabrielle gently snorted that...

hmm what are you taking again? human resource? my school don't have leh. but got lotsa other useless stuff like communication skils. but then again we have chemistry, life science.. dunno if nus takes those as well.

 
At 7:14 PM, Blogger Kenny gently snorted that...

*Brainfreeze*

 
At 9:23 PM, Blogger Jayaxe gently snorted that...

Attitude and behaviour are different, really. Attitude is what you show to those who are your juniors. But you BEHAVE nicely in front of your superiors. Ah... got the idea?

 
At 9:31 PM, Blogger Adrian gently snorted that...

Yeah, business modules are full of bullshit. We engineers are the shit, babe! We kick ass!

 
At 10:04 PM, Blogger Krisandro gently snorted that...

Okie, this ranks way up in the most mind draining post I've ever read... YOU GAVE ME A HEADACHE!!!!

 
At 10:23 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

jx: heh.. u must show attitude to ur bosses oso mah.. good ones lah.. kekke.. thx for the tip bro.. but if i write that on wed, i think i'd get a D

adrian: yeah we're the shits!!!

gab: yeah we do.. and we hv much more shits to study abt here too..

krisandro: sorie ah.. keke.. intelligent soundin a bit for a day la

 
At 10:26 PM, Blogger Guojun gently snorted that...

Heee, contrary to you, I aced all my non-engin papers... All my engin modules I got Cs and Ds... thank God I'm not an engineer... I will never touch those things again!!! Haha.

 
At 10:43 PM, Anonymous Sleepless in Bangkok gently snorted that...

Hi

More Jokes and less educational stuff yes?

Its boring over here.

Oh, and HRM,like so many this we HAVE to study, does NOT work in real life. Proven by myself haha

 
At 11:13 PM, Blogger CELLE gently snorted that...

guojun: i am not surprised. most of my engine mates dun wanna touch engineering also..

sleepless in bkk: hehe aitee.. more bullshits comin up

 
At 10:52 AM, Blogger Ed, Edd & Eddy !!! gently snorted that...

Hey, I'm taking HR2002 this sem too. Guess by now the paper is over. And yes, I agree with you. HRM is bollocks!

 

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