My tusheez

This blog was started once upon a time when a young girl at school didnt know better but thought otherwise. So the way earlier entries can be crass and words inappropriate so please don't judge. As now the person has evolved into someone older and wiser (hopefully) ..:.... But some of the entries were classic and hilarious so I don't have the heart to delete them :@ Well we were all young (read:wild) once, right?

Saturday, February 26, 2005

Why Females make Pizz-lousy Presidents

First of all, it's gonna be hard for her to convince the masses that she's not just another pretty face. She may need to shave the top part of her hair and bind her boobs to achieve their trust.

Second, let's admit it, females are the more emotional species of the two (or three). At certain periods in the month, they tend to be rather neurotic, gooey, mushy, moody and during other periods, they may want to start humpin their subordinates. At times of disappointments, they are vengeful and irrational. I am not saying that men aren't like that, but let me be sexist towards my own people for awhile.

I know that stereotyping is unjust.
But, you'd all heard of " Hell knowth no anger like a woman scorned"...
Let's say a Japanese stud broke Ms President's heart, she'd launch missile X780i (wah lau like handphone lidat) the next day to bomb Tokyo. A French guy, then bomb Eiffel, a Cuban; bomb the ganja plantations, a Singaporean, then.. err... Bukit Panjang (??), a Briton; bomb his wife's house in the English shires, an Indon guy..err.. dont bother bombing siah..dun waste your ammo...

Women are also damnn fickle-minded (again stereotyping), you'd have a hellish time listening to her orders, Monday morning says war!.. Monday night says peace!, Tuesday, she'll be asking why the bazookas are not ready, Then, when you've got it ready..all aimed sui sui at Kubhagazakhtan, she'd tell you to just scrub them shiny. Damn those women!!!

Next argument is that she'll be spending National Revenues on exotic Spas, slimming centres and Manolo Blahnik's heels....

However, there are tremendously good points too:
She'd be an active feminist movement leader and raise taxes for male employees.
She'd make everyday a ladies' night at clubs.
She'd lower taxes on strapons (ala Ali G)
She's state that paternity leave is compulsory and supervised!
She'd impose fines on unmarried males over the age 40 and impose death penalty on husband's infidelity! (YAY!)
She'd make Mother's day and Valentine's day National holidays.
She'd smoothen relationships with the U.S (especially during Clinton's era).

I'd say Hurrah!

Disclaimer- all statements above are purely bullshit, pls dont arrest me. No hard feelings!